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Archaeology is making the ‘Picts of Galloway’ famous: in contrast are historians and philologists, who denounce them as mythical, fictitious, non-existent, and (in short) being for Galloway what Monsters are for Loch Ness. However, since the supposed Picts of Galloway refuse to vanish from journalism and popular culture, what follows gives accounts of them over the years. Readers can then put the evidence of archaeology besides that of history and linguistics, and decide for themselves.